With this semester wrapping up, all eyes are tiredly set on the bleak light at the end of the finals tunnel… The Final Semester. As I procrastinate various papers, presentations, and study guides, I would like to take a minute to talk about the classes that I didn’t take at Champlain College.
Now, let me get one thing strait, I am not from around here. I didn’t know anything about the quirky little world of Vermont, beyond the bottom of my Vermonster Ben and Jerry’s treat. So, as I considered my college options, the magical world of Green Mountains and trees teeming with sugar mystified and intrigued by suburban Maryland brain.
After four years of school, I am happy to report that Vermont is everything that I had hoped it would be.
The classes however, are not*. While I’ve attended many that I am very happy with, I would like to leave with you here, one ginger’s suggestions for future classes to be developed in our beautiful state.
Dead Leaves 101 (DLS-101)
For mere weeks each autumn, Vermont turns into a wonderland of yellows, reds, greens, and browns. Don your favorite beanie, pick your favorite flannel and prepare yourself to learn the proper documentation of your boots surrounded by colorful deceased foliage. You can’t find dead leaves like this anywhere else!
Advanced Maple as a Career (MCT-341)
Take a closer look at the sugary force behind one of Vermont’s sweetest exports. This level three class with delve further into Grade A and Grade B syrups, the best trees to tap, and touch on how to make your maple stand out from the rest!
How to Survive in a Blizzard (LEAD-151)
Fulfill your first year LEAD credit with this super helpful seminar! Do you think your Ugg boots will keep your toes from shriveling up and falling off? How much long underwear will work for your budget? Which of your friends would be the best to eat if necessary? Get these and all your questions answered before the first frost.
Photography of Burlington Sunsets (ART-115)
Take to the waterfront for the most consistently beautiful sunsets you’ve ever seen. We will discuss the best Instagram filters, Panoramic versus square, and how yesterday’s sunset shot differs from today’s.
Advanced Lumberjack Internship (LBJ-422)
Build on your Lumberjack experience with a full-fledged internship class. Here we will evaluate your beard growing skills, develop your axe swinging mastery, and asses which burly connections will be best to highlight on your LinkedIn account.
Making Flannel Work (FAS-227)
Before you thoroughly embarrass yourselves on the slopes or relaxing downtown, you need to know which flannels are real VT and which are 2008 American Eagle. Acquire knowledge in what works with your Sorels, 8am class flannels vs. date night flannels, and the real truth to flannel long underwear.
What classes should your school instate? Let me know!
*This is, clearly, a joke. Don’t get your flannel long johns in a bunch. Champlain’s classes were great. Carry on.